Here is a recent circular released by the state of New York DOI that outlines what in their view are acceptable additional services offered by carriers and producers in the service and provision of policies.
http://www.ins.state.ny.us/circltr/2009/cl09_09.htmThey also state that from time to time they may revisit the list to determine what services are legal and what are not.
Based on the circular, at least in NY, COBRA admin would be allowed; FSA administration would be disallowed (though help with the discrimination testing might be). Wellness programs are allowed as long as they are specified as part of the policy or contract and the producer would be allowed to provide risk assessments and strategies to reduce risks. So help with setting up a health fair and providing wellness info would likely be allowed but the producer actually paying for flu shots may go over the line.
I want to emphasize this is just one state's take on rebating. Check with your state department of insurance. They may have recently updated their outlook on acceptable practices. It would be nice if the NAIC would come up with a model policy because the individual states are all over the board on this.